A Future You Can Believe In

When your self-esteem begins to rise, you realize you have options you never hoped for. Suddenly, your future isn’t bleak and depressing. It’s exciting and filled with new opportunities and experiences. Rather than dreading the future, you’re anticipating it. So, what’s next? How do you get from where you are today to that bright, shiny future that you’re looking forward to?

It’s time to dream a dream.

Start by dreaming. What is it that you really want to do? Try to think about what you’d like your life to look like if money and time weren’t factors. Would you take dance classes? Start your own business? Embrace your inner artist?  Travel across the country in an RV?

You can’t work toward your dreams until you’ve identified them. It’s OK to have multiple dreams. Most people are multi-passionate. They have a passion for several different things. You don’t have to just pick one thing and be that for the rest of your life. 

What does your future self want to accomplish?

It’s time to figure out what you want to accomplish. This isn’t about titles or money or fame. It’s about how you want to be remembered. How will leave your mark on the world? 

Do you want to be remembered for being that sassy businesswoman that provided clean drinking water for an entire village in a third world country? Do you want to be remembered as the artist and foster mom of countless teens that didn’t have a place to go? Do you want to be the secretary that decided to go to medical school at age fifty? 

What do you see as the major roadblock to making that happen?

Anticipating roadblocks ahead of time can be helpful when you’re thinking about the future. Common roadblocks might include time, money, or a lack of emotional support. You don’t have to have all the answers right now. Just acknowledge the road blocks. By doing this, you’ll be better prepared mentally and emotionally when you encounter setbacks or problems along the way.

What does your life look like when that road back is in your rear mirror?

No matter who you are or what you’re trying to achieve, you will encounter roadblocks. In order to prevail over them, you have to have a clear vision of your future. This vision has to be strong enough to motivate you when you’re still living your ‘before’ story.  If your goal is to go back to college, then imagine that moment when you walk across the stage in your graduation gown. If your goal is to start a business, imagine that moment when you get your first client. Hold onto your vision.

Dreaming about your future and planning for it can be exciting. It can also feel a little scary at times. But don’t let the fear stop you. You deserve a beautiful future filled with dreams. 

Start creating your beautiful new future today by downloading the free workbook. 

Love and light,

Shaline

Conquering Negative Self Talk

Low self-esteem can cause negative self-talk. This can further lower your self-esteem causing a vicious cycle where you continually feel bad about yourself. The good news is that you can change the way you talk to and about yourself. When you conquer negative self-talk, your self-esteem will improve. You’ll gain more self-confidence and you’ll feel more optimistic about your life in general.

If you’re ready to break the cycle of negativity, you need to understand these essential truths.

Actions follow thoughts, so your thoughts are important.

Your actions always begin with your thoughts. If you think that you’re destined to be overweight, then it doesn’t matter how many diet books you buy or how many nutritionists you talk to, you’re still going to be overweight. You’ll stay overweight because you haven’t changed your mindset.

If you want to change your life, you have to change your thoughts first. Instead of thinking that you’re destined to be overweight, flip the script. Say to yourself, ‘I am in control of what I eat and how much I eat’. Doing this changes the story you’re telling yourself. You just went from the victim in this story to the victor.

You don’t have to be carried away by negative thoughts.

You are the only one with the power to change your mental soundtrack. Just because you have a negative thought doesn’t mean you have to listen to it. You have the power to change your focus. Instead of concentrating on the terrible day you had, start thinking about a simple pleasure you’re anticipating like getting to change into your warm pajamas tonight or hearing your son’s laughter during a silly bedtime game. By focusing on the positive, you’re teaching yourself to let go of negative thoughts.

Garbage In = Garbage Out

It’s hard to stay positive if you’re constantly consuming negative information. If you really want to change your negative self-talk, then you have to focus on consuming good stuff. You want to read and watch content that lifts you up. Not only will you feel better, you’ll notice that your self-talk is more optimistic when you focus on the good. 

Practice positive affirmations.

What you say about yourself becomes your truth. That’s why it can be helpful to practice positive affirmations every day. Start by looking in the mirror and telling yourself, ‘Today, I choose to be happy’ or ‘Today, I choose to fully accept myself’. When you speak these thoughts out loud, they’ll begin to affect how you talk to yourself and how you live your life.

Everyone struggles with negative self-talk at some point in their life. The important thing is not to beat yourself up when you realize your thoughts are negative. Accept that you had a negative thought and replace it with a positive one. 

Conquer negative self-talk when you download the free workbook.

Love and Light,

Shaline

Is It Your Environment that Needs to Change?

Low self-esteem and a lack of confidence can be caused by a number of things. Many people think that to fix low self-esteem, you have to look inside yourself. While it’s true that there are internal things that cause low self-esteem, there are also external factors that can contribute to low self-esteem. 

Instead of looking inside for all the reasons you’re not more confident or successful, let’s look at the space you live in. Ask yourself these questions and spend some time thinking about your answers.

Are You Playing Small?

Sometimes we feel small because we’re living small. This doesn’t mean that you have to drop everything and go backpacking through Europe right now or that every moment of your life has to be an epic adventure. 

But for many people with low self-esteem, it’s easy to get into a rut. You start believing that you can’t do better and so you stop trying. You create a self-fulfilling prophecy without realizing it. Look at your life right now. What limitations have you accepted without challenging them? What areas of your life have you accepted as “good enough”?

Are You Encouraged and Uplifted by Your Friends and Family?

We are deeply influenced by the people we spend time with. This can be a good thing if you’re spending time with positive people. But if your friends and family are unkind or negative, that same attitude can rub off on you.

Ask yourself how you’d feel if you didn’t speak to a certain friend or family member for a week. Would you feel relieved at the thought of missing Aunt Sylvia’s rants about the job she hates? Would you feel sad if you missed that call from your sister who helps you see the best in the world? 

If there’s someone negative in your life, you don’t have to cut them out completely. But do look for ways to limit your time together and don’t be afraid to change the topic of conversation if things take a negative turn. 

Are You Pursuing New Experiences?

Often a lack of confidence and self-esteem can be caused by becoming too comfortable. You do the same things in the same way every single day. You don’t change things up. You don’t challenge yourself to experience new things and you don’t go beyond what’s safe and comfortable. This can cause you to stop growing as a person.

When you go outside your normal and look for new experiences, you open yourself up. You discover new ways to do things. You find solutions that you wouldn’t have come up with any other way. You learn more about yourself and the world around you.

You can find new experiences in your life just by looking for opportunities outside of your comfort zone. Try a different type of cuisine. Drive a different route to work. Volunteer at an organization that you wouldn’t typically support. Take a weekend road trip and see where you end up.

Your environment shapes your self-confidence, so don’t be afraid to look around at your life and make some changes. Surround yourself with people and experiences that build up your self-esteem and make you happy. 

Discover how your environment is impacting you with a free bonus workbook.

Love and Light,

Shaline

#selfesteem